Every year in my city there are over 200 stillbirths and neonatal deaths. There are more than 1800 documented miscarriages, every year, in my city alone. These are the facts, that I had not been aware of until I lost my daughter.
My truth is that Alexandra is one of those 200 for 2010. The inconvenience of talking to me, of knowing me, is that you are exposed to my truth. People complain about having to hear about the babies lost. People complain about having to hear about miscarriages, stillbirths, SIDS.
People that are pregnant complain that they don't want to hear about it, it makes them scared. Imagine how WE feel.
People complain that they don't want to think about it, it's too sad. Imagine how WE feel.
People complain that our loss is not real because we didn't really get to know our babies. Imagine how that makes US feel.
People say those things without thinking about how their words impact people that have suffered a loss. But yet, we should hold our tongues and be respectful of their ignorance of our situation, after all, they have never experienced it. I don't believe I have ever experienced their level of ignorance, so I think that they should hold their tongues when I tell them how I REALLY feel...
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VERY well said, Melissa.
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I agree, very well said.
ReplyDeleteIt's true and I know how it feels, but to save my sanity while growing another life inside me, I can not think about it often. Nor can I talk about it much or I will go insane.
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