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Wednesday, October 20, 2010

Horrible

Last night or early this morning a little newborn baby boy was found in a dumpster. Umbilical cord still attached.
This kind of thing has always really bothered me, abusing and mistreating the innocent, it has always made me sick to my stomach. Now however, it's even worse. The thoughts that go through my head. And I will say it, the FIRST thought that goes through my head is "Why did THAT woman get to have her baby?" WHY? It's not fair that she got to have her baby and I didn't, I LOVE my baby, I WANTED my baby, I never would have mistreated or hurt my baby. WHY!? Why didn't I get MY baby?
It's part of the It's just not fair section that has cropped up in my brain. That section came with a horrible guilt section also, because I feel BAD that that is the first thing that comes into my head. I would never wish something bad on anyone else. I would never wish this pain on anybody else, and that's not what I am thinking, like I wish that that baby hadn't made it so mine could, that's not it. But it still seems so unfair.
The second thing that goes through my mind is...give that baby to me! Don't you know that I WANTED a baby? That I love and planned for a baby? Don't you know that my arms and my heart were robbed of that baby? Give the baby to me, I'll take it, and I will love that little baby with all of my heart.
It's just so hard to see this. Don't people know how lucky they are? To just leave a little baby all alone, don't they realize what so many other families would do for a baby? Don't these people THINK about the pain that that poor baby is suffering, wondering where his mommy is?
What is wrong with these people?? 
I feel like my whole emotional self unravelled when I heard about this story.

4 comments:

  1. You are not alone in your thoughts. I saw the story on the National last night and lost it.

    I am so sad for the baby and so sad for the mother who felt that was her only choice yet so very very angry that there are so many of us who have lost our babies and would do anything to have them back and she made the decision to do what she did when there are so many loving people in the world waiting and wanting.

    I hope the babe is doing well and gets placed in the loving arms of a family who will provide all of the love and protection they deserve.

    xo

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  2. I have no idea... There is no justice in this world.

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  3. I heard about that baby too (it made the news in Ontario). It just makes me sick. Who can leave a baby in a dumpster? Couldn't she at least have left him in a hospital, a police station, in a mall? Something.
    It makes no sense why women who do that get to have living babies, none at all. And if she did that, what did she do during her pregnancy?

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  4. amen and halleluia to every word you've written here.

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